Vacation In Paradise
It comes every January – my complete boredom with the cold Canadian snow and cold. I start daydreaming about heading south, finding refuge under a palm tree or 10. Hubby and I have started talking about where we’d like to go this winter, we haven’t been on a vacation alone in years. Even before anything is planned and finalized, I am already worrying about leaving the kids. What if something happens to us? To the kids? Will they be alright?
I never leave their side, so how will they manage without their Mama?
This worry is starting to get the better of me. Instead of narrowing down the adult-only resort locations, I’m again contemplating bringing them along. For peace of mind. After all, we brought them along on our family vacation to paradise last year, and it went perfectly. Sure, I couldn’t fall asleep in a lounger and always had my eyes on them. But, it was remarkable to play on the beach with the kids, and see them light up to new animals. It was wonderful to have my lovies with me in my perfect oasis. Life was great! And, I didn’t have that nagging feeling of guilt in leaving them behind. A vacation isn’t much of one if you are sick with worry about those you left in another country. It’s the life of a parent, and all the worry that comes with it!
I’m contemplating a family-friendly vacation condo rental, in Florida. It’s located along Ft. Myers’ coast. We have never been to the area and I have heard great things about Florida Vacations. Having a whole cottage for the kids to explore, rather than a small hotel-like room is ideal when you have children. In fact, that is one complaint about our family vacation last year – we were so cramped for space when in our room. With kids, it’s always nice to have full amenities and the feeling of a ‘home’, when traveling so far from home. I know this Mom is happier with more space, and less tripping on toys! You can get a great deal on rentals, and then find savings on flights as well.
So, can I have my paradise and my kids too?
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We’re currently planning our first trip away form the kid. I’m nervous about leaving him but I know that he’ll be fine with family. The kid will go on MANY trips with us but the husband and I deserve some alone time.
Okay, so this year we did both. For our 10th anniversary we took off to Vegas together, leaving the kids at home and my parents moved in. It was the 1st time I had been away for that long from my daughter, and it had been a long time (2+ years) since I’d been away from my son. Let me tell you, although I missed them so much, and we called every day, it was so good for us to have a break and just be us. Not worry about naps, or meals or anything. We totally enjoyed ourselves.
Now, my parents also just took the whole family to Maui for a week. Yeah, nice right? It was so wonderful!! It was so neat to go somewhere like that with the kids and go swimming daily and to the beach and see the whales and just experience so many new things with them. We loved it and can not wait to go back. (however long that takes to save up money for). But let me tell you, it was not an “intimate” get away *grin*.
so it totally depends on what you want out of your trip. Escape from winter and fun with the family? bring them. Quality time with the husband? Try it!! The kids will be _fine_ and although you’ll miss them, it’s good for you too.
Great advice, Carole!
It’s still under debate, but it’s great to know that there’s excellent choices for both routes!
Just like you, I was torn about bringing the kiddies or leaving them at home with my parents. It had been exactly 3 years since I had gone ANYWHERE for a little time off from reality and I was both excited and stressed out of my mind. Would they be OK? Would they cause trouble for my parents? Would they miss me???
Well, I’d like to report that last night we landed back home in YVR safely after being in Vegas for a few nights, just Hubby and me. It was a wonderful experience being “free” like we were just the two of us again. I say free with quotation marks because I always had the kiddies on my mind but there was no one to think about but us (no snacks, no potty or diaper breaks, no naps to worry about) and we knew the kiddies were in great hands.
Every morning we began our days Skype-ing with the kiddies. They could see us and we could see them. It was extremely comforting to SEE them and not just hear their little voices (or in baby-E’s case, squeals and babble). Since we knew when bedtime was we would call just before bed to say good night or we’d call ahead of time when we knew we’d be out to see a show or we had dinner reservations.
It’s hard when you’re home with the kiddies every day and trying to decide to take a trip with or without them. In my case, I was only gone for 3 nights. Hehe… the word “only” is used very loosely because it was still a big deal to me. But deciding to go by ourselves is definitely a decision I don’t regret one tiny bit and my first trip in 3 years was a complete success!
Now if you excuse me, it’s time to get ready to go see my kiddies for the first time in 4 days. I can’t wait to see their gorgeous little faces!!! Good luck with your decision. Just know that whatever choice you make will be the right one for you because no matter what, you’re on vacation!
Hi Janice!
Great to hear you had a good time away – 3 days seems less stressful than the 1 week we are planning. Plus, we are debating an area where there is little to no internet service. Oh, I love Skype though….great idea! Yet, when I went to Toronto last year and hubby stayed with the kids, talking to me on the phone upset them so much, I wonder if seeing them online would make it worse for them…?
My sister will not leave her kids even with my parents because she went for 2 nights and said she had no fun withour them because all she did was think about them. On the other hand i have a friend that goes and as long as thier with grandparents she is ok and has a good time. So i think it’s what you are happiest doing. But you do alot with your children and maybe a little break would be nice! You will have to let us know what you decide, my 2 cents, one is a nice family vacation, and two is total freedom!!
…so, what’s ‘freedom’ exactly?? lol
It’s been so long, I don’t remember – being ‘me’ again would be a nice treat, wouldn’t it?!
I think it’s still VERY important to get away without your kiddos, and to a) get over worrying about them (they will be FINE, you may take care of them best but you’re NOT the only one who can take care of them) and enjoy your hubby, and b) be gone long enough that you really do miss them. One day the kiddos will be gone and it will just be you and your hubby then. Nothing wrong with thinking about the babes at home, or calling to touch base with them if you must, but it’s SUPER important to just be YOU with your hubby sometimes.
That being said, I think you can still book a nice time away with all of you – those family vacations are important too. All inclusives are nice so you don’t have to worry about feeding everyone, etc., but a condo on a beach anywhere would also be nice (and you can simplify meals and plan around naps, etc.)…
That’s my 14cents worth! lol
oh, I also forgot to mention – I REALLY do understand the whole “what if something happens to us or them?” line of thinking. But…. I don’t think you can spend your whole life wondering/worrying about that, and not do things because of it. It’s worth making sure things are in order before you go (maybe updating your wills, etc.). We went to Indonesia on a mission trip for 20 days when my youngest was almost 3. Was I worried about what might happen to us while we were traveling? Yes, a bit. Same thing when we spent 10 days in Hawaii without my kiddos – I even put them on a plane to fly without us down to my hubby’s parents. Was I worried, for them and for us? Yes. And I could have ruined both of those trips with worry. Instead, we had times when we could talk to them, and I had to let go of the worry and missing them – and enjoy being ME with my husband. It was totally worth it! We’re driving down in April and dropping our kiddos off with the inlaws again for a week. Will I be worried about the 2 days of driving they will have to do without us? Yes. Will it be OK? I don’t know. But I will choose not to worry again. (It’s hard, but it gets easier after you’ve done it a few times. I’m not a cruel heartless mom, either, honest! I just realize that there is life outside of and after kiddos – I don’t want to get there and totally have forgotten who I am or who my hubby is!)
The kiddos need the break from us, too, I think! LOL! Then they appreciate who we are when we are all back together again!